wahahaha was havin a heated talk with qy abt hairdos ^^ damn cool nia.. haix.. sadly uruha's hairdo dun suit me.. but i like it. how? lOLX! mayb i'll juz cut fat ruki's hairdo x= HAHA! tat'll DEFINITELY suit me ^^ oh well.. wanted to blog abt some of my reflections.. but didnt. mayb not so good ba.. but nvm la! haha. i'll juz b more bitchy today n talk all abt myself! WAHAHAHA x= omg?


oh.. i always have this qn in mind.. Y DO GUYS PREFER GALS WITH LONG HAIR??? haha does this mean i'll nv find a suitable guy? x= get wad i mean..HAHA omg.. i think i soundin despo x= but who cares! i'm still a gal n still human x= ppl always say they not despo.. but actually they r DYIN for e attention of guys.. as who arent? lolx.. so noww.. i DECLARE!!!!!!! I M A DESPO!!!!!! this makes me not one rite?? =D lOLX ya u can diao me all u like man ! i'm in a crazy mood... if any guy can ans my qn.. i'll thank u greatly =)


next... went out today ya.. saw gazette's NEW album N.I.L Nameless Liberty Underground x= lOLX 72 bucks in HMV.. left one copy CAN U BELIEVE TAT!! omg la.. haix.. my mom dun let me buy... dun let my sis buy for me too = = COS SHE HATES THEM? she thinks tat they look like shit = = bt seriously.. wad has looks to do with music? u do good n nice music.. ur looks r bonuses ya x= she thinks them too goth ba.. but i've seen worst.. n i like them cos i think they've improved alot from e start till now =) their songs r more smooth n comfortin to me =) i really wanna hear them.. my sis dun mind.. but my mom = = haha.. my sis kinda supports me gettin it secretly x= LOLX she's so open abt stuffs.. man.. i love her =) ねーちゃん!　愛している!!!!　o(^-^)o lOLx heehee.... 今日は忘れいない。ありがとう!　ほんとうにありがとう！ねーちゃんはいちばん！ ok... wad else =x HAHa i duno.. alot of stuffs ba... e rest of e day was smooth?


kinda thinkin abt my future again.. i feel sadd tat somehow my life seems so controlled by my mom x= haha i duno.. qy talked abt dyin of hair n all x= i dun think mom'll let me do such things ba.. not tat i dun _stand wad she thinks.. but i still wanna juz do this kinda weird stuffs.. cos.. i guess i wun have e chance in future? i duno x= this goes e same for goin goth.. cos i juz like it.. like e style.. e uniqueness.. e difference tat nt everyone likes.. =) n i admire those who dare to express themselves in such a form.. seriously. its something i guess i dun have so... i'd envy? cos.. if i dun try it now.. i guess i wun have e chance to anymore.. when i work n all.. do u think i'll get e chance to b like tt? dun think so rite.. unless u doin something in e goth line. hmm ya... my sis was rite when she say tat even when it comes to uni.. i wun consult my mom x= but my mom... insists tat i consult her.. this is how i m diff from my 6 yrs older sis ba.. i m stubborn ya.. n wanna do wad i wan n like.. not do wad others wan me to x= its always a consequence.. like takin JC ed.. but then i didnt noe wad i wanna do.. felt so confuse.. nt cos i hate poly life.. but cos i didnt know wad i wanted.. =) now i kinda noe... which road i wanan take. it'll b hard.. but i hope i can survive n live long enuff to c e end of it =) now my main concern is my freedom.. seems like a samll petty thing rite? bt... to me its impt.. cos its something tat u guys have n i dun.. haha.. wad sort of freedom? its ALL of it.. the ability to do wad i like wheneva i like.. but of cos with it comes maturity.. who knoes.. i may start smokin.. takin drugs x= bt i dun think so.. i think if i were suddenly to b given this freedom, i'll either take it for granted.. or i juz wun knoe wad to do with it.. =) some ppl may perceive me sayin all these as a stage of rebellion or rebellious nature.. but hey.. could b a result of e controlled life... but also.. could b cos i m born tis way x= i also duno la.. but.. i guess this is still something i gotta solve on my own.. decide ny path. i nv complained much of tis to my mom ba.. mayb tats wad was wrong.. e lack of communication.. cos i know.. even if i tell her. .she'll come up with a bunch of stuffs to keep me from it. so ya.. i dun wanna hear e bunch of stuffs.. so in order to prevent it.. it all gets vented out here =) cool rite?? lOLx x= guess not. sometimes i juz wish for better parents? i not sayin i have unlovin ones.. but.. i juz wan parents who can b more like frends.. who will like.. try n _stand u.. in e sense tat they'll find out wad u like.. n y u like such stuffs then get into it themselves.. enjoy with u.. tis i feel is good bonding.. not only in terms of visual kei.. but like.. bladin? playin pool? juz go n bowl? things like tat.. my fam dun do such stuffs ba =) haha


omg.. so long liao??? x= wanted to say somemore.. bt for now shld b enuff.. lOlx now u guys c how petty n childish i m? =) but i duno.. to me its impt ba... we r all diff.. n its e differences tat makes us unique n special.. which brings opp ppl together.. so tat we can learn from each other n mayb learn more abt life ba =) after all.. i strive to b unique! haha! =) or mayb i juz strive to b like everyone else.. =) who knows.. guess i'll juz stop here.. more work to do.. =)


p.s I MISS U ALOT! PLS COME BACK SOON!!!! ^^ lOlx o(^-^)o