★ Sunday, August 10, 2008
2:39 amon the daily note.. i m so tired~ i think i'd juz fall over on this chair now n snore away. but i cant cos my hair aint dry yet~ =( slept less than 4 hrs~~ slept at roughly 4am *cos i couldnt sleep, had to play my laptop's playlist!* was sleeping in the living room, n it wasnt my bed, and it was dark n scary? =x woke up at 7.45~ from then was all the way till 11.30 when i could safely SIT DOWN ON MY CHAIR IN FRONT OF MY LAPPY! > < *yawns* tired... tml mizuki-san'd be on her way back to her hometown Miyazaki. =) left her a personal comment fully in jap! hope the grammar's okay =x these 2 days~ was doing alot alot of translations~ and learnt new things, new words etc =)from now on going to try to master JAPANESE! the farniest part? my y.sister who's supposed to be like WAY WAY better than me kept quiet like 3/4 of the time! freak duno y she so shy to speak la = = scared say wrongly. but i dont care~ =x i juz dun like it when i ask her to say something to mizuki, she tells me she doesnt know, then i try on my own and make a little mistake, she'd give a mocking laugh and say things like... "you didnt know?" or.. "i thought u knew.." wtf. tat was e only thing tat pissed me off~ One of actually. something else would be... i dont wanna say la. tired.
anyways, on the inner mode now. i guess this is really just me this feeling. the difference b/w u n me. at the end of the day i still feel like this!! I must go against all this "pre-determined" theory! though its very true =( hmmm... maybe this is the reason i cant have any close friends~ i'd give a lack of freedom, which i dont wanna do =x feels terrible. tats y maybe this is one of the reasons i m fated to be living in a certain type of solitude. i get attached so easily. i need to learn to relax and let it go easily.. *sighs*
right now cant think anymore. juz living by the days for the days are also starting to lose a certain sense of meaning in them already.... or maybe i just need sleep~
今も生きるの意味を探す…
★ キキ様でした ☆
