★ Sunday, April 01, 2007
somtimes.. i do feel cold.
12:18 amcold water landed upon me once again. i m shivering here.. crouched at the corner of the street, out of the way of the road lights. i guess i let my guard down for 10 secs juz now lOL n i paid e price for it. lOL~ haix =) nothing's changed.. a broken doll once again ^^ weird huh. history goes round n round n round. hittin myself for being so careless today. ^^ unlucky me.... my spring kinda broke... cant come back up anymore for a while. gonna remain hidden ^^ inspiration coming back lOL mayb i shld fall more.. so i get more to write > < =P
decipher me... break thru my codes.. understand me... stay with me... heal me... please...
wad is this shock, this wave tt hit onto me...
stumbling and falling... i landed in a din.
my hands r bruised... my legs r scarred
my feet is crushed... my bones are broken...
yet they dun hurt no more
the numbness has taken over... my nerves r damaged
yet my heart's still bleeding
the air has gone cold... i clutch my chest...
y... do i feel like its all gonna end.
i hold my breath, pls go away i pray..
nothing's changed as i lay on e ground
the dust is still there as i take it in
my eyes start to close... my mind lost its sanity
i tried to scream... but no one heard me die silently
i didnt feel lost anymore... i felt no more sadness
cos finally... my wish was granted...
at the tips of my mouth
i whispered into ur ears...
"... for everything..."
to my special K
been thinkin again LOL~ =) guess wad!!!! i found some aNSWERS. ahhh ehxxx how shld i say > < family is really impt =) so dun feel crushed up ok? they r all u have. n u noe... its hard to live up to ppl's expectations n we tend to feel useless all the time.. but hey~~ ur parents love u alot.. tts y they expect from u =) n u love them too tt u dun wanan disappoint them.. =) u c... so dun worry urself too much. ya they nag the scream they shout at u. they wanna b heard too ^^ u r all they have n they dun wanna lose u. so... appreciate them too. b4 u regret anything. sometimes they juz duno hwo to express themselves to u. so they may overdo things. let them know... n they can change. they r afraid to lose u, so they hold on to u. u dun wana lose them too so u do wad they tell u to... n tts e truth of life =) *ps. i know u say.. I SHLD B TELLIN MY SELF TIS. but it doesnt apply to me lOL~~~ =)* so PLS appreciate wad u have.. u've got no idea how lucky u r. its good to b grateful once in a long while. when one's showered with love, they nv c it... but when one's living without it, they know wads true love. =) i know u'd prob b readin tis at night... n if i dun get to talk to u soon.. =) sleep tight n nitex *huggies n kisses*
-ki-sama-
今も生きるの意味を探す…
★ キキ様でした ☆
