previous entry too long so i wan continue here.. x= lolx seriously... i dun wanna grow up so fast. i miss innocence n unknowning anything. the old times when i was a kid... i dunno anyting bad... gualible though i mayb, but nvm... inter trust b/w ppl brings more peace than knowing how to deceive.right? i rather b childishly happy then maturely sad. running away mayb. but sometimes its e only way to survive longer.


so many ppl complain they r suffering n such. they all blame it on God. x= lol so many things tat happen to me lately.. sometimes i'll wonder if its a punishment? a testing?? i always believe tat God'll nv let u go thru wad u cannot handle. no matter e tests. not given by him, but by e devil.. who seeks to turn us all away. lOLX i noe this sounds preachy.. but i need to clarify tings. God's not testin us.. he juz allow satan to tests us. to prove our faith to e bth of them =) for God how much will i go... how far will i give... i seriously duno.if i can give my life for him... i'll b e happiest... cos even if i noe e bad i do, n i may not b saved nor rewarded nor recognised.. but i noe i did my best... e most i can give.. my life. and i can finally rest in peace within myself.. dying in love of God. i think tats e greatest anyone can do n e greatest gift anyone can have.hmmm but mayb i m not ready for this test yet... i m only still stuck like a rocking boat.. hw well can i serve in devotion i wonder... haix.. =) mayb cos i dun wanna devote.. cos i refuse to b restricted.. who noes... but i'll love God for givin me all tat i have.. tis family.. tis life.


should i turn back time.. i wun wanna change my life... cos i m who i m... i'll still be e same old me.. nth will be different =) LOLX oh ya... y m i typing to much?? cos i using my sis laptop.. keys so much softer.. nicer to type.. so must type more x= LOL kiddin la!!!! > < cant stand e bright screen though. haha i prefer a darker screen. ya i noe i like dark things.. everyting black n white ^^juz like my dream..


was thinking.. when was e last time i talked abt falling in love with someone.. lOLX as i blogged la.. as in really liked someone.. i think got over 6 months ba. lOLx didnt noe i got so put off with falling in love.. tsk tsk. no.. i dun happen to like anyone now.. juz tat i nth to do so think of such a thing only =) haha ya circumstances can make ppl change their character ba. so now... i guess I M PUT OFF WITH BOYS haha! cant imagine at all... omg. m i turning crooked??? hope not.. no no i still happen to like ルキ、沙我、虎、戒.... HAHA etc etc.u c... guys in ur own fantasy world r more perfect ne? =) no time to think of anyone anywayx. no one striking my eye. haha let me continue to dream ba =)


but of cos i accept e fact tat not everyone thinks like me. ppl do wan n like companionship. but for me... music n my life is enuff for now.. =) haha! so long entry.. will b long till i next update! > < so jaa ne! tc nia v(^-^)o